Create the Ultimate Jailhouse Fantasy Football Team
So Aaron Hernandez has been arrested and charged with the murder of Odin Lloyd, a semi-pro football player and alleged friend of Hernandez. If convicted, he could face life without parole.
This got me thinking that there are so many players that have been arrested for a variety of different charges– probably enough to create a pretty decent fantasy football team. With that in mind, let’s create our very own Fantasy Arrested Football Team.
The main guidelines for this team are that the player is still technically an active player (not necessarily on a roster, but definitely not retired) and the player must have been arrested for some kind of offense. Convictions are not necessary. We will be drafting only our starting lineup which consists of the following: one QB, two RBs, two WRs, one TE, one flex player (WR/RB), one kicker, and three individual defensive players.
If I was drafting such a team I would have to choose the following in no particular draft order:
K Sebastian Janiskowski, Raiders- After all these years, Janikowski still has a booming leg evidenced by being one of three active kickers that have tied the NFL record for longest field goal ever. Sebastian was arrested twice for being drunk and once for possession of a controlled substance, all while still helping the Raiders into multiple playoff appearances– including one appearance in a Super Bowl.
QB Matt Schaub, Texans- I know most of you would choose Michael Vick in this position, and I did give him a lot of consideration. In the end, I had to with Schaub who is guaranteed to be the starter in Houston and an All-Pro receiver to throw to in Andre Johnson. Vick, on the other hand, isn’t guaranteed to start for Chip Kelly and has a nice history of fumbleitis. And yes, Schaub was arrested while in Atlanta (ironic) for assault and battery in 2004.
RB Marshawn Lynch, Seahawks- Beast mode was arrested on suspicion of DUI way back in 2012 in the Oakland area. His prowess to make big plays makes him a fantasy dream.
RB Adrian Peterson, Vikings- Arrested for resisting arrest in a Houston nightclub back in 2012, too. His remarkable season last year was just a little reminder of his true greatness.
WR Dez Bryant, Cowboys- Arrested after allegedly hitting his mother, Bryant came with his best season as a pro. Down the stretch, the only receiver that was more explosive and had bigger stats than Bryant was the man they call Megatron, Charles Johnson.
WR Justin Blackmon, Jaguars- Arrested last year and charged with DUI, started out slowly in his rookie season. But by the end of the season, anyone could see that he is one of the up-and-coming young receivers in the game.
IDP Aldon Smith, 49ers- the San Francisco sack-master was arrested for DUI in Miami after the 49ers’ playoff run ended short of a Super Bowl. He came back and came extremely close to breaking the single-season sacks record, and was a huge reason for the team making it to the Super Bowl.
IDP Elvis Dumervil, Ravens- Another excellent pass rusher who can rack up points with sacks, tackles, and takeaways. While with Denver, he was arrested in 2012 with charges of aggravated assault with a firearm that were eventually dropped.
IDP Jared Allen, Vikings- Twice in 2006 while with the Chiefs, he was arrested for drunken driving. He is still a very dangerous pass rusher, just two seasons removed from nearly breaking the single-season sacks record, he would also give you points for his sacks and takeaways.
Flex Ahmad Bradshaw, Colts- the former Giant star running back, surrendered to authorities to serve two separate 30-day sentences from a probation violation stemming from a misdemeanor he got as a juvenile. Bradshaw is still the kind of player that could rack up both rushing and receiving yards, as well as his fair share of touchdowns.
Well that does it, right? I’m missing a position? Oh look at that, I am missing a position on my team. So last but definitely not least:
TE Aaron Hernandez, Patriots- Talk about a highly productive player that wasn’t even the top target on his team playing the same position. And as he was about to become the top target on that position on his team, he goes and acts as if he is a definite suspect for murder. While no one knows what his legal outcome will be right now, there is no questioning how awesome he was on the field. He even lined up at running back a few times when the Patriots had depth issues at that position.
Well that is my fantasy team of players that have been arrested. What players would you choose?